Undoing
by HeyWhoTurnedOutTheLights
Summary: After all his years, he shouldn't need reminding twice.
1. Better Man

The Doctor let the cooling ash of a French aristocrats parting words filter over his fingertips as he stared out over the glassy black expanse of the ocean. Blood and orange painted the sky with fantastic strokes of light and he thought this was a perfect place to remember another fantastic friend.

Steps on the loose shale behind him made him turn and the sight of Mickey stood a few meters away surprised him. He'd half expected to see Rose, and although their fight was long resolved he didn't want to share this moment with her.

"Doctor." Mickey grunted by way of greeting and shuffled forward slowly as his eyes traced the alien skyline, noticing similarities and differences with the same stubborn incredulity.

"Mickey." The Doctor kept his voice even, not too bothered by the interruption, he'd been almost done really.

"What's this place called then?" He shoved a large booted foot into the shale, watching the reflection of the last light bounce off the shimmering rocks as they danced over the cliff side. The Doctor watched the spectacle before glancing up at Mickey.

"Jeston Hailix. A memorial planet set up in the 67th Century for the fallen heroes of the Politian Wars. There were so many casualties on both sides that an entire solar system is taken up with their graves. This planet was set up half way through no mans land for all to claim as their own. But you didn't come to ask about the sights did you Mickey?" His quick conversation change threw the young man and he's only mildly pleased. He's not been with them long enough to be able follow the rambling track of his thoughts, to notice the inflections that led to his drawling monologues or sulking sharp ended sentences.

"No."Mickey picked up the gauntlet he'd been thrown with aplomb. Although he had seen this coming, The Doctor is more amazed that it hasn't happened sooner. "it's about Rose."

The Doctor turned his head back out to the horizon his hands disappearing in his pockets as his voice drawled a reply. "Ah. Rose."

Mickey shuffled behind him and the Doctor could almost feel the awkwardness of the man's actions as he fought to find a place start. This parliament would be tense and fraught if either took offence and both are aware they must tread carefully now.

"That happen a lot, you off at a party while Rose gets tied up?" Mickey's voice was questing and light, and for the moment The Doctor thought he might still leave this planet unscathed.

"Happens as much to me, if not more." The Doctor scratched his ear as he sent a curious glance up at Mickey, his gaze still fixed firmly in the distance. "Rose knew that before she joined me."

"Did she know that you'd leave her behind." Mickey's voice was strangely flat and a tingling shudder danced between The Doctor's shoulder blades as he pushed himself to his feet.

"No." The admittance was quiet and The Doctor held back a dark laugh. His reasons for leaving Rose behind were more selfish than either of them would hopefully ever realise. Earth's past was curiously important to him now, one wrong move one slight change and he could lose her from his life altogether.

"I know I'm here as just a buffer between you an' her." Mickey laughed bitterly and shoved his own hands in his pockets as the sun sank a little lower in the sky, purple bruised clouds scudding across its solemn procession. "An' that was all right, I wanted to be in your way." Mickey nodded, his face full of a strange mix of belligerence and masculine pride.

"I mean, I seen you and Rose together, loadsa times, I said all that stuff about her being your girl, barely even joking." He shook his head in mysticism and looked back to meet the Doctor's gaze. "But I didn't seriously believe it. Not till I signed up." He trailed off and turned his head away clearing his throat loudly.

"I didn't want to lose her and that happened the night you blew up Hendricks. I love her enough that I still want her happy." He stopped suddenly and swallowed and it was a few minutes before he spoke again. The Doctor waited patiently feeling the change in temperature on his skin as the suns leading edge touched the horizon.

"I been thinking, you know, bout finding a planet or a time, a good one, starting a new life maybe." He shrugged briskly at The Doctor's sharp look. "Dunno if I'm allowed or anyfin, but I wanted to try summat new. I thought I'd be leaving Rose in safe hands, and I wanted to see if they were still yours." He looked cautiously at the Time Lord before turning to face him properly now, the last crescent of sunlight sparkling on the slow rippling sea behind him.

"I know Rose thinks she gets you, with all that equal respect for all the universe bollocks, but I'm not blind Doctor, I understand an' I get you."  
Mickey stepped forward, anger spicing the brown in his eyes. "You might be an alien, some Time Lord or whatever, but underneath You're just a man." His head shook once, slowly as if he was just realising this now. "and you'd better listen to me, cos if you hurt my woman again I'll kill you."

The Doctor felt his own anger sparking inside him at this basic challenge. Who was this human to talk to him of threats and promises? Did he think he'd not do enough to save her? Or rather does he realise the truth of it; that he didn't know now when to stop, when he's done enough to save her and not a prelude to slaughter.

"She's not yours." The Doctor straightened, pulled himself taller as he glared down at the younger man, his words almost a growl.

"No." Mickey conceded with a reluctant nod. "She's completely her own and for some reason she's chose you." He looked completely baffled and The Doctor hid a smirk. "This ain't my blessin'" He turned to look out over the ever darkening sky. "But I'm gonna be the better man."

The Doctor nodded his agreement, feeling the mass of Mickey's words pressing on him, stifling him. His feet pulled him away from the cliff and back towards his ship but he couldn't stop the words escaping his lips as he walked away.

"I think you're right about that one Mickey Smith. Definitely the better man."


	2. Undoing

The air around Cardiff was a maelstrom of fury as it charged over the rooftop of Jack's hub and buffeted hard against The Doctor's back, whipping his coat tails around him. The sky over the city was angrily grey and streaked with silver and he thought that the pathetic fallacy would suit the scene perfectly. His skin prickled and danced with the static hum of the rift, and he turned slightly away from the city to feel it sing against his cheek.

"Time Lord?" Mickey's voice rang with sarcasm, clear even with the wind and The Doctor raised an eyebrow. It begins, he thought absently, the drama is tense and vibrant as the defendant stands to hear his sentence.

He nodded firmly and turned to face his jury. This will do. A perfect setting for the no doubt angst ridden, guilt laden conversation that he is long overdue. The one he may have been avoiding for say, only the last couple of decades. He deserved this.

"Oncoming Fool more like." The Doctor looked at Mickey's face , noted the offensive pose and the steely gaze and realised that he may be a little scared of Mickey Smith.

"The worst thing in all this is that you know. Every word I could say, every reason, you know it." Mickey looked amazed and The Doctor felt momentarily wrong footed. Shouting, maybe hitting, he'd expected those, but amazement? Nope, definitely not amazement.

The surprised look slipped from Mickey's face as it hardened with anger, his voice rising. "You still did it! You still pushed her away - into the arms of someone else! I thought you were supposed to be smarter than me?" His face was incredulous as his fists clenched, the knuckles paled and The Doctor hoped that Jack's lounging presence near the door was as referee in this match.

"Rose!" Mickey rubbed his face that forbidden name almost a groan of disbelief. "Man, if she'd ever..." He trailed off shaking his head as his hand moved to the back of his neck in his confusion. Faster almost than the wind he stood straight, his hand fell to his side, and a mounting look of pity swam in his eyes. "You're just delaying the inevitable."

Jack murmured something that sounded cautionary to his young agent, but his words were snatched by the roiling currents in the air and The Doctor frowned his frustration even as he muttered.

"There's no way back."

Mickey's laugh was a sharp bark that left the listener with an unpleasant feeling. "Still not seeing it are you Doctor? Still seeing life through that Canary Wharf coloured haze?"

Jack's body tensed at The Doctor's slight hitched breath, but Mickey knew just how far he could push him, had spoken this palaver before with different words on a different world a long time ago. He pushed on.

"Bad Wolf, it's always been Bad Wolf." There was no triumph in his voice at the play of this card, his face was empty and his eyes were blameless.

"What are you talking about, Bad Wolf? What's that got to do with the cannon? No more riddles." The Doctor could feel something churning in his gut and he feared it may be the sickening feeling of regret, of realised mistakes. A memory, drenched in gold flashed into his head, the words whispered there, a shiver of time against his mind.

_I can see everything! All that is ,all that was, and all that ever could be. _The Doctor rebelled against the implications of Mickey's claim_._ No, she couldn't have, wouldn't have seen it, not then.

"Rose is smart, 'lot smarter than back before she met you. But to modify the Cannon _and_ build a time machine? In 8 years?" Mickey's curled lip was scornful as the Doctor's hands flew to his hair, twisting the wayward strands, desperate to make sense of the information Mickey was drip feeding him.

"Then what? I don't know... she had help?" The Doctor felt desperate as possibilities shouted for attention in his mind, time lines shifting and adjusting and clearing and oh dear.

Mickey sighed and turned towards the door. "She was always coming back Doctor. Everything she's done since her hands slipped on that lever has been to get here. 50 years for you."

The Doctor could almost feel the reproach rolling off him and his frown deepened as his feet stopped. "Mickey, what did Rose need a time machine for?"

Mickey made that sound again, the laugh that wasn't a laugh but he didn't turn around, his head dropped a little as he played his ace. "Now that's my favourite part innit?"

His voice told the Doctor that this was nothing of the sort. Although he and Mickey would always be at odds over Rose, they had always had one thing in common; Rose's happiness and now The Doctor had realised his mistake he felt all the more shame in his previous ignorance.

"Wrong Rose, wrong world, wrong time, because you did what you thought best." He laughed at the guilty look that danced in the Doctor's eyes."I knew it, I knew I was right!" His exclamation was hollow as he raised an eyebrow, sarcastic and almost disgusted.

"I did mention the time machine didn't I? Tell me Doctor, answer me _this_ riddle; what's blonde, 76 and stuck in the past of an alternate dimension?"

Mickey turned again and this time The Doctor's shock halted his ability to protest. Something clanged loudly in his mind as thousands of time lines snapped together in one golden shining strand.

The answer to his question escaped his lips with a jerk."Bad Wolf."

Mickey's laugh as he walked away would haunt his dreams for years he was sure, and the sound of it chilled his skin in a way that wind could not. Jack met his incredulous stare with eyes that were brimming with sympathy. The Doctor looked away, eyes unseeing as they stared over the bleak city-scape, hope and devastation raging in stalemate in his heavy hearts. He'd done it again, he'd forgotten her.

He always forgot, pushed that aching grief into a small numb box, just so he could cope.

He always forgot. And it was always his undoing.


End file.
